Taylor Swift “1989” Farewell Tour

 

Four years ago I gave marketing advice to Taylor Swift she totally ignored.

In that missive, “Will Taylor Swift repeat history in 2011 21st Century marketing genius Marketing Sociologist recommends a holiday 2011 greatest hits 2 CDs” http://tweenmarketing.blogspot.com/2010/09/will-taylor-swift-repeat-history-in.htmlhttp://tweenmarketing.blogspot.com/2010/09/will-taylor-swift-repeat-history-in.html I wrote: “She'll be 21 in 2011. She's been on the charts non-stop since 2007.”

So for seven solid years Swift has been at the top of the charts. Only a few musicians can make that claim, i.e., Elvis,The Beatles, Rolling Stones. A rare handful. Certainly not Carly Rae Jepson. Doesn’t even look like Justin Bieber will.

So now my marketing advice is for Swift to bill this as her “farewell” tour. It is her first pop tour, so why not make it a farewell tour? Look how long KISS, Garth Brooks and Cher have been going since their farewell tours.

A three year tour. Then take my advice offered up four years ago – a couple greatest hits CDs like The Beatles blue and red albums. Right at winter holidays 2017.

She takes two years off. Gets married, has a couple children (Quit laughing. It could happen. Maybe.).

Then in 2019 she debuts another country tinged CD. She returns to the stage, saying the “1989” farewell tour was accurate. It was a farewell to her pop experiment and she’s returning to country (which is really Swift pop as all but her very first songs have been).

She’ll be around 30 at this time. A good second wind for a career that started when she was 14.

Why music industry dead No original ideas like Malia and Sasha's Summer School Concert Series Featuring Selena Gomez

Want to know why music industry is dead? No creative ideas.

Imagine buying tickets ($100+ per pop) for the concert event of the year?

Selena Gomez has a new CD coming out. Who's hotter? Okay, you're right, Taylor Swift. Yet Swift is on tour. Gomez has nothing in concrete yet. What an opportunity.

Imagine - The Malia and Sasha Summer School Concert Series!

A worldwide tour starting in June, featuring Gomez, The Saturdays, Austin Mahone, Britt Nicole, Bridgid Mendler and Ross Lynch.

Make sure this tour is on one of the major morning shows ever Friday during their summer concert series.

Unfortunately, the shows start at 3 p.m. and end at 9:30 - bed time and curfew, you know.

Don't forget the "guest appearance" - genuine Secret Service agents.

21st Century teen years celebrity nominations for sainthood

Was looking at the whole Catholic sainthood nominating and selection process recently. Think it is time for 21st Century teen years nominations.

St. Steve of Apple

Apple
Apple II
Macintosh
NeXT
Pixar
iPod
iTunes
iPhone
iPad
GUI

That's enough to get him sainthood!

St. Lindsay the Fire Crotch

Incredibly, she's still alive. Good enough for sainthood.

 St. Kim the Kardashian

As Barbara Walters noted, she doesn't sing, she doesn't dance, she doesn't act. She has one of the most popular television shows, leads you in Twitter and Facebook numbers. Ironic what a sex tape can do to get you canonized.

William Shatner Phoenix Comic Con 2012 Captain James T. Kirk or Denny Crane

How to Save Two and a Half Men

 

The ninth season of Two and a Half men has probably not produced one laugh. The acting is superb, but the writing stinks.

Reportedly the show has been approved for a 10th season - miracles do happen.

It is time to bring new life into the show.

Walden Schmidt's new venture is sold. He gave Alan Harper 100 shares, that are now worth millions. To show his appreciation to Alan (and get him out of the home with his new bride, Zoey), Walden buys Alan Goldie Hawn's and Kurt Russell's home that is three doors away from Walden. It cost $15-million, so Alan is thankful.

Walden has also become a business school professor at Pepperdine, right near his - and Harper's - beachfront homes. He's able to get Jake Harper and his best friend Eldridge Makelroy into the college. They move in with Alan Harper, hence, they are now the two men and Alan's half.

The show needs a new executive producer. Mel Brooks and Carl Reiner are still alive - get them to bring the Dick Van Dyke charm to the show, or Rob Reiner or Tom Hanks. Fire all the writers and start new.

Since Eldridge and Jake live in a beach house - a celebrity beach house - they are asked into the best fraternity at Pepperdine, where they have access to the finest sorority girls. Jake, being a Harper, could be like his Uncle Charlie.

Better yet, after seeing what Walden has done, Jake and Eldridge get involved in startup funding enterprises and buckle down in their studies, become good role models for teenagers, a focus the show could shift to.

Imagine Selena Gomez, Demi Lovato and all the hot stars that Jake and Eldridge could be dating. Turn Two and a Half Men into the show where stars have to be on it.

A recurring part could be Kate Hudson comes to Alan's new home, looking for a photograph she's sure is still in a closet. She and Alan start dating.

Ironically, Berta is also a house mother of a sorority at Pepperdine, where Jake and Eldridge go pick up their dates.

Another option is to go back to when Alan was the Evil Alan at the end of season eight, the year Charlie Sheen left the show.

Are these new Ke$ha songs from an unreleased album?

There's even more on YouTube. Is it really Ke$ha?

Aly & Aj 78violet call out nude photos on Twitter What do they call this?

Ok seriously people...have we not learned our lessons?? Nude photos taken of yourself = bad press= low self esteem= YOU ASKED FOR IT! - Aly & AJ post on Twitter

Lady Gaga, Amazon Cloud marketing strategy 99 cents CD and WOM What I don't like about Lady Gaga perfect voice

This past week Amazon and Lady Gaga married (Marry the Night?) for one of the best marketing strategies I've ever encountered.

For years I have explained to people Amazon owns cloud computing storage. In May the cloud went down, challenging its viability; as well as messing up PlayStation for Sony.

Along came Lady Gaga and a 99 cent CD sale of Born This Way. If you bought the CD, you got like a five year free trial of the cloud. You can tell I passed on the deal.

Amazon paid $8.40 for the 99 cents CD I purchased, according to Billboard.

While Amazon tied in with what is probably today's #1 recording artist, Lady Gaga got something in return.

You can tell by the Billboard article, Lady Gaga's Born This Way will be the #1 CD on Tuesday (May 31, 2011).

Lady Gaga also benefits. It creates WOM - word of mouth, the greatest marketing tool ever known to mankind.

My personal believe is this 21st Century marketing tool (formerly public relations) has established Gaga for the next 15 years. Hard to believe, but Britney Spears has sustained her career for an even dozen years now and has no sign of letting up. Put Gaga in the Britney, Madonna stratosphere.

Again, personally believe Gaga's Born This Way is unstoppable throughout June (2011), and will be able to withstand new releases by Beyonce, Selena Gomez and Dolly Parton.

By the end of June, Gaga will add somewhere from a million to five million to her net worth, and that's not counting the song writing $. That, my friend, is true marketing in the 21st Century.

Now what I don't like about Gaga. Nit picking. Here voice is too perfect. In the days when people like Demi Lovato and Selena Gomez use vocal "sweeteners" to enhance their vocals, and keep them in tune, Lady Gaga sounds like she's been trained extensively in vocals.

Listening to Born This Way at the gym this morning, it hit me. There's no machine between her voice, the microphone and the recording device. Not even Taylor Swift can make that claim. It's like someone who lives off junk food. If you feed them quality diets of vegetables and other good food, they're going to get sick. My problem with Gaga's vocals.

Lastly, would like to introduce Kareem "Jesus" Devlin, guitarist extraordinaire from my favorite Born This Way song, Electric Chapel.

Like this country version Lady Gaga Born This Way

YouTube Lost and Found Elvis Costello Oliver's Army